From Nightmares to Sweet Dreams
by MerDer McAddict
Summary: Derek recounts one of the worst days of his life to his wife, Meredith, and she helps him to forget. MerDer smut, and a McBaby.


Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Grey's Anatomy, just have a vivid imagination and a burning desire for a McBaby! Rated M for Sexual Content.

Oh, and not everything's grammatically correct but oh well. Enjoy, let me know what you think!

"**Derek! Wake up!"**

"Whaa? What? I'm awake."

"If you're going to kick the crap out of me all night, you can go sleep on the couch. I have a surgery at 7. I'd appreciate the next 4 hours of sleep dear." Derek sat up on the side of their bed and sighed. Meredith opened one eye and looked at him, then sat up as well. "What's wrong baby? Nightmare?" "Yes, Derek softly said. The same one." Meredith looked at him with a pained expression and cut the bedside light on. She leaned forward and rubbed his bare shoulders, and kissed his back. "Derek, that was almost 5 years ago." He quickly turned and looked at her. "I know that Meredith, but I can't help that I have a nightmare about it." He rubbed his eyes then looked at her and began to speak.

"That day we had been arguing, after you tried to drown yourself in the bathtub." "I did not try to drown myself, knight in shining whatever!". He chuckled. "Ok, well, you still weren't happy with me. Addison was driving me crazy at work with all the looks she gave me when I came around you. Then Richard began freaking out about the ferry crash and the traumas, and you were suddenly gone. Cristina said that you had been called to the field, so I decided to go too." "When I got there I talked to you and turned around and you were gone. I'll never forget all of those poor people. I looked and looked for you and then saw that damn little girl…"Derek! Lisa was in shock!". "Whatever, she could have said something, I kept asking her where you were, Where is Meredith, use your words.. It took a moment for me to realize in horror what she meant when she pointed to the water." "My heart sank, and I threw my coat off and dove into the water. It was so cold, and at first I couldn't find you. I came up for air twice before I saw you. You looked so, well, dead."

He paused and took a breath and grabbed her hand.

"I pulled you to the surface and ran up those stairs carrying you." "Meredith, you were so cold, clammy, and blue. You weren't breathing, your heart was still. I was sure I had lost you and I couldn't breathe either." He looked at her and reached up and wiped a tear from her cheek. "Do you want me to stop?" "No, she said. You can keep going." He wiped another one of her tears and continued. "We got you into the ambulance and I began CPR. Mer, you were so pale, cold, and still so, so blue. You had no rhythms except what I was creating. I kept frantically doing CPR, I couldn't stop, wouldn't stop. Every breath I breathed into you was a fervent prayer that you'd open your eyes and yell at me. I kept calling your name, praying you'd wake up.

We got to Seattle Grace, but Bailey couldn't get me to leave your side. I went into the trauma room with you, trying to bark orders to nurses, but Richard stopped me. I was already beginning to crumble. I walked outside and dropped to the floor, ignoring how cold I was in my wet scrubs. I lowered my head and cried because I felt so helpless. The love of my life was dying before my very eyes and I was a doctor, and still couldn't do anything."

"Sweet memories flooded my mind along with all of the times I'd hurt you. I wanted to go back and hold you in my arms and tell you I'd never let go." Meredith leaned forward and kissed a tear off of Derek's cheek. He rubbed another tear from her chin, and looked into her greenish gray eyes.

"Mark came and sat beside me in silence. He was just there, I know he didn't know what to say." Then he said, "She knows you love her." I thought, but does she? "Meredith when I got you out of that water and saw you, that was one of the worst moments of my life. I could hear the whine of the machines as they worked on you. I thought of how selfish I had been with Addison, and how you had just loved me and I had let you down. It hurt me at how many times people had hurt you and let you down in your life. I went in and yelled at your mom, and then she decided to die. I tried my best to save her but she was already gone. I crumpled into the hall again not knowing what to do, or what I was going to say to you, if I ever got to speak to you again."

Then you woke up.

I realized at that moment that I loved you with all of my heart, and I couldn't live without you. You are my soul mate."

Meredith leaned forward and kissed the tears from his face and lifted his hand to her chest. "Do you feel my heart?" she said. "It beats for you. It beats for our children. It beats for our future, our past, our present. That is in our past. I'm sorry you still have nightmares about it, but I'm here now and that's what matters." " I love you with all that I have, and I'm happy to be Dr. Meredith Shepherd. You hurt me, I hurt you, that's our past. We've been together and married for so long now. I'll never leave you, I'll never run, remember?"

He nodded his head and kissed her neck.

"I remember how sore I was, how much all the epinephrine and shocks had hurt my body, but when you climbed into bed beside me and held me, and stroked my hair, nothing hurt anymore." Derek leaned forward. "I vowed that night to never let you go again. You were so small, I had to protect you." Meredith hugged him. "I love you more than you'll ever know", she said.

He kissed her mouth and his tongue massaged hers. He lifted her shirt over her head and began to trail kisses down her neck, onto her already hardening nipples, massaging her breasts as his hands began to work on her pajama bottoms. "You're wearing way too much clothes", he laughed. She laughed too and yanked his boxers off, exposing his hardened length into the dim bedroom light. He pushed her down on the bed and she giggled.

"Make love to me, Derek" she breathed, as his tongue made circles around her belly button, and when he blew air on it she almost came off the bed. He pushed her back down laughing and his tongue delved into her with such force she almost came then and there. "Derek, oh God, don't stop", she panted. He hummed as he rubbed her sweetest spot, and slowed down when she bucked against him. "Now, Derek, now, she cried. Not needing another invitation, he inserted two fingers inside her, smiling at how wet she already was.

"You drive me crazy", she breathed. "Not half as crazy as you drive me", he panted. He kissed her lips with such passion that she was sure they'd be bruised in the morning. Her tongue licked his neck, her fingers wrapped in his dark curls. Her eyes were almost a smoky green, and his burned blue. He tilted her head back and kissed her neck. He lifted her leg up to his shoulders, and thrust into her with enough force she cried out his name. "Oh Derek, keep going, deeper," she cried, adjusting her ass, and spreading her legs wider for him.

Another thrust sent him straight to her cervix, against her g-spot, and the mixture of burning pain and pleasure sent her over the edge. She knew she'd walk funny in the morning but at the moment didn't give a damn. Don't stop, she panted. Sweat glistened on Derek's back as he tried to breathe. She was so tight, so wet, he drove into her again and leaned back as she came again, clenching her muscles around him, screaming his name, nails tearing the skin on his back. Feeling her release sent him into a mind blowing orgasm, and he came, kissing her tears off her face and he came again. He collapsed on top of her, still inside her. She wrapped her legs around him again, and relaxed. He looked at the fire in her eyes and laughed.

"You're insatiable," he laughed. "Well if you weren't so damn good, McDreamy, she laughed. She ran her fingers up and down his thighs, and he caressed her cheek, smiling that perfect Derek smile of his that made her melt. She lifted up and flipped him onto his back. Slowly, she slid down on top of him, letting him fill her again. She leaned back and moaned, amazed at how much she could love one person. He thrust into her again, rubbing her nipples with his thumbs. She moaned, and he put his hand over her mouth. "Don't wake Maycie up", he laughed.

A few more thrusts and they both shattered, clinging to each other as they climaxed together. As they lay in each others arms, sweat running down their bodies, Derek leaned over and kissed Meredith on the cheek. "I love you Dr. Shepherd," he said. "I love you, Dr. Shepherd," she smiled.

Suddenly, a cry sounded from the next room. Meredith looked at Derek and smiled. He hugged her and gave her a kiss on the cheek before hopping up and pulling his boxers up, walked into the nursery and brought back their six month old daughter, Maycie. She was looking into her daddy's eyes with such love it brought tears of happiness to Meredith's eyes. Derek handed his daughter to his wife. "What's wrong Maycie Claire, she cooed. Mommy's here." She put a pacifier in Maycie's mouth and rocked. Her little girl sighed happily and closed her eyes, leaning back against her mother's warmth. Derek settled back down into bed and put a pillow down for Maycie. "I hope we're not starting something here," he laughed, smiling down at his beautiful wife and daughter, proud of what he'd done with his life.

Together, the family went back to sleep, happy to have each other, and a happy ending. *

-Fin-


End file.
